Transitional Life Care, Inc

There was a man who died and was being taken to heaven by angels. The angels said to him, “We are going to take you to heaven, but first we will show you hell.”

The angels then took him to a place where there was a great bowl, so great that it was as big as a lake. The bowl was filled with a nutritious stew. All the way around the sides of this bowl were people. Emaciated, starving, miserable people. These people had spoons to eat the stew with, and the spoons were long enough to reach the stew (about 12 feet). The trouble was, while they could scoop up the stew into the spoon, they could not get it into their mouths because the spoons were too long. So here were all these pathetic people, suffering and moaning in agony, constantly trying to eat the food that was abundantly in front of them - all in vain.

Next, the angels took the man to heaven. To his surprise, here was the same scene! There it was, a giant lake-like bowl of the same stew, surrounded by people with 12 foot long spoons. Yet something was different here - all these people were smiling, happy and healthy looking!

“Why? What is the difference here that these people are happy and well fed?”, the man said to the angels.

They replied, “Have you not eyes to see?” The man looked more carefully and observed that o­ne person would scoop up the stew and bring it to the mouth of another. Then someone else would scoop up the stew and feed it to the other.

The angels smiled and said, “Here the people feed each other. Here are the people that learned the way of LOVE.”

My dear ALL,

It dawned on me recently that I have a lot of information here on the website about cancer and parts of the researching I have done in general but not much information on exactly what I envision Transitional Life Care to become someday. Knowing that the site is receiving numerous hits daily, I’ve decided to put the researching aside for the day and take some time to try to explain my vision. This is done in an attempt to help bring understanding of TLC and my desire to open it to everyone who doesn’t talk directly with me. And I need to bring understanding to others to begin obtaining funding in an attempt to get out of the business of massage so that I can work on building Transitional Life Care, literally.

Many of you already know, as a massage therapist I work in part with cancer clients. I’m most often utilized at the end of someone’s life. This is my passion. This is my pride. This is my desire. Working with people this way brings me more love and understanding then I could ever begin to write down. There is no way I could ever explain in black and white just how beautiful each and every person is that I’ve had the pleasure to work with but I’ll give it a try. Just last week, I was fortunate enough to share some time with Lucy.

Lucy has ovarian cancer and has been battling with it for more than five years now. When you look at her, you will see that Lucy has little hair left on her head because of taking chemotherapy treatments. The whites of her eyes are yellow, similar to the color of her skin because she has jaundice. Her cheeks are sunken from the lack of ability to eat much. Her kidneys and liver are shutting down. A clear hose is snaked into Lucy’s nose and around her ears bringing her pure oxygen to breathe. Lucy has an estimated two weeks left to live. I took one look at Lucy and fell in love. She is one of the most beautiful women I have seen. As I looked into her eyes, I was allowed to see into her soul. I was allowed to see past the physical features and into the real woman. Tell me, how could it get any better than that?

Lucy is a very lucky woman. She has many family members who love her dearly and are able to take care of her. She has chosen to die at home, surrounded by her loved ones. Lucy can see the familiar scenery of her outside world, the one she has lived in for many, many years. She has all the comforts of lying in her own bed, watching her own TV, listening to her own music. Everything you and I take for granted every day, Lucy has. She is fortunate. Not everyone is afforded this pleasure. Some people do not have family members who can arrange to be with them all day and all night long. Some people do not have access to go outside whenever they gain the strength and desire to do so. Some people are forced to live out the last days of their life in the hospital.

In the hospital, you do not get to hear the birds singing next to your window. You do not get to feel the heat of the sun on your skin nor watch as the wind gently blows the leaves on the trees. You do not get to have your purring cat curl up next to you and you don’t get to pet the dog you love so much. In the hospital, the little things that used to bring you so much pleasure are taken away from you. In return, you get to hear everything that is going on in the room next to yours, down the hall from you or worse yet, in the bed right next to yours. Why would anyone want to spend the last of their days in the hospital?

Only because their loved ones cannot bare to have someone they love die at home. Can you imagine how hard it would be to stay living there once that has happened? How could you ever sleep in the same bed again? Look at the room the same way again? I think it would be bittersweet to have someone I love die at home. Why would anyone want to die in the hospital? Only because their loved ones cannot take care of them the way the dying need to be taken care of. Day to day life must go on, even when people we know and love are dying. Jobs still need to be attended, bills still need to be paid, children need to be taken care of and the clothes won’t wash themselves. Nothing stops in order for you to have the time and money needed to spend with your dying loved one. When they are in the care of the hospital, you can rest assured that they are being taken care of the best way possible and the government takes care of a lot of the medical bills for you.

Transitional Life Care was born after talking with the loved ones left behind after someone died in the personal home. Transitional Life Care was born after dealing with terminally ill clients that had to die in the hospital. Transitional Life Care was born after taking my brother into the hospital to die almost twelve years ago.

The way I see it, Transitional Life Care will be like home away from home. Bring your dog. Bring your cat. Bring your bird, your books, your children, your pictures. Bring whatever will make you feel best and will bring you peace in your final days.

Picture, if you will, ten units attached to each other, yet insulated very well so that we cannot hear what is happening next door. I envision a V shape with a common area in the center. Call it a TV room; a library; a kitchen/dining area; a place where we all can gather to share stories of death and dying, and/or of life and living. Why do we have to be alone when we die? Why not share our energy, our love and our memories right up to the end if that is what we desire most? The choice to be alone should be that . . . a choice, not a requirement because we are dying. Built similarly to a one room cabin, each unit will have two floors. The first floor is for the patient. Very basic, there will be a bathroom, a closet and the rest is open. Complete with couch, chairs, tables and bed, the room will have a large bay window so that we can enjoy the outside. The second floor will be what I call a half floor, an open bedroom area where family members can stay if they wish. Getting the picture? Good. Let’s go outside . . .

Outside, I see a botanical garden of sorts. Trees, flowers, shrubs and grasses, a pond with gold fish, butterflies, birds and who knows? Maybe even a deer or two. I believe the people who will take advantage of Transitional Life Care will be people like me; people who love the outdoors and nature. I think to have a small lake with fish for the people who love to fish would be wonderful. And each time a person would pass on, their loved one could plant a tree or flowers honoring their special person, along with a plaque with the person’s name in our garden. We could turn the area into quite a lovely sanctuary, couldn’t we?

I could go on but I think you are getting the idea now. I hope this has helped answer some questions. Please pass along this site link to anyone you think would be interested or who may be able to help out in any way.

Until next time, with light, laughter and love,

I am Diane

Dear family, friends and loved o­nes,

As you now know, the website for TLC is up and running, thanks to the perserverance and devoted energies of my son, Rocky. He designed this site completely, with little help from myself. I think he has done a beautiful job for us and I’m very proud of his talent, abilities and his willingness to assist me with this endevor. Who would have thought that I could help raise such a kind and intelligent young man? But he does take after his mom, though! Rocky, thank you from the bottom of my heart. I love you very much.

I have two more favors to ask of each of you today. Please, if you would and for the good of All, would you send out more prayers, positive thoughts, energy and all the love you have to some more special people in my life?

The first is to Dorothy and her son, Nathan. I received an email tonight from Dorothy… it was recently discovered that Nathan has testicular cancer. Nathan is still very young and, not that anyone ever deserves cancer, but he should be out enjoying his life right now, not having to fight for it. Please, for the good of All… Nathan, much love to you and I wish you all the strength you will need to overcome this challenge in your life with empowerment and hope. Dorothy, I love you. Much strength to you, also. Please let me know if there is anything I can do for you or your family.

The second is to my friend and client, Michael and his family. Michael has lung cancer, the kind smokers get, o­nly Michael has never smoked nor does he surround himself with smokers. In 1998, the lung cancer was discovered and at that time, he underwent the removal of his entire right lung, chemo and radiation. Things were looking good until a few weeks ago when the cancer decided to peek out again, this time in the liver area. Luckily (?), Mike can receive more radiation since the cancer has resurfaced in an area where he did not receive treatment before and he will undergo treatments five days a week, for the next six weeks. Michael, I love you. I send to you all my love, my positive thoughts, energy and all the strength you will need to overcome this challenge with empowerment and hope. Please let me know if there is anything I can do for you or your family.

Please continue sending your love/energy/positive thoughts to Mary as well. Thank you, everyone for your assistance. Together, we will make a difference.

I’m still making slow progress with TLC’s business plan. I’ve whined to enough people that someone has come forward, perhaps o­nly to shut me up, with some assistance. Thank you, Ed, for all your time and energy concerning this plan. I appreciate your care very much.

I would also like to thank Claudia for her acceptance to coming aboard as another Board of Directors for Transitional Life Care, Inc. Claudia, you are an angel to me. I love you BIG!

Some of you have been asking how you might help out and until now, there was nothing I could think of… until now. Now, I ask that any and all of you who could, please search the web for other places such as TLC. It seems that TLC is the first of it’s kind, offering housing outside of a hospital or personal home for the terminally ill. The closest I have found to TLC is a place in Philidelphia called the CALCUTTA HOUSE. The Calcutta House is for those who are seriously ill with Aids. Their site can be found at www.calcuttahouse.org

I have search the web with “terminally ill housing” “end of life housing” and something else that this little noodle can’t remember at this time of the evening. Any and all assistance with this search is greatly appreciated.

Also, if anyone knows where I might find the yearly financial reports for Hospice of Greeley, Loveland and Fort Collins o­n the net, I would sure appreciate the information. I need this because until I find something closer in nature to TLC, Hospice is the closest there is and I need the financial information for the business plan.

I think this is everything that has happened in the last two weeks with Transitional Life Care, Inc and Diane Madden, CMT CNMT.

I am very blessed to have each of you in my life and I love you all. Thank you for all your support; for all the cheerleading I have received; for all the love; the care; and the beautiful thoughts.

With much light, laughter and love,
Diane

Dear friends, family and loved o­nes,

Much of today was spent working o­n TLC’s business plan and checking out the forms TLC will need to fill out in order to officially become Non-Profit. The business plan alone has over 74 pages to it and the IRS forms total about 27 pages worth, not to mention all the pages of instructions. Having no background in this type of documentation, I’m being challenged in understanding some of the words and phrases used but I am having fun all the same. If anyone ever wants to help me out with any or all of this, I would be more than grateful for the assistance! We could have a lot of fun, brainstorming some evening if anyone is interested!

Dear family, friends and loved ones,

First of all, I want to thank everyone who responded to my last email concerning Transitional Life Care. The feedback was wonderful and just what I needed to continue on with renewed strength.

Some of the responses I received were in an attempt to help me network with someone else whom might be of help; especially with the paperwork on the 501 (C) (3) status, which will enable TLC to become a Non-profit organization so as to receive grants and donations. And many others have offered assistance with internet searches; mailings; anything I might need help with. (No one has offered to come over to clean my house yet, though.*Hint*) Many of your responses have brought me to tears knowing so many of you are beside me in this quest to offer housing to the terminally ill. I am truly blessed to have so many people in my life who support me in so many beautiful ways. Thank you all.

And one very special response was from a man I have not met in person yet. Glen has offered to donate some of the stock he owns in the company he works for, to help fund this. He also has offered his man power in the land preparation and with any maintenance once things are up and established. Thank you, Glen, for your special support.

Because of having set TLC up as a corporation, I was in need of establishing a Board Of Directors. I’m proud to say, I now have three special people on the Board Of Directors for Transitional Life Care. Thank you Matt, Scott and Jill. (What do you say… the Caribbean for our annual meetings?)

The bylaws have been written and accepted, giving Brad a small break from me bugging him each day for the last two weeks. Thanks for your patience, Brad.

With my son’s help, we are setting up a web site for TLC. Look for it in theaters near you. Just kidding. It won’t be in theaters near you but by the looks of the other web sites Rocky has set up, I am very fortunate to have his assistance in this and am looking forward to the day I email each of you with that address. P.S. - if anyone needs help setting up a web site, Rocky is trying to establish a business to do this very thing so let me know and we can network some more.

As you can see, a lot has gone on in the last two weeks. There is NO WAY I could have done any of this alone. I hope I have been able to express my gratitude proficiently for all the help I have received so far. I am eager to continue my relationship with each of you.

With light, laughter and love,

Diane